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Thread: Hugging

  1. #1
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    Hugging

    We may have discussed hugging here in the time we've been here, searched the title but can't find it. Bear with me if I'm, once again, repeating this question.

    How do you feel about hugging? Do you like to hug? Do you like to receive hugs? How do you feel when a person you don't particularly like, hugs you? How do you feel when you've hugged someone and get the feeling they would rather not have you hug him/her?

    My Dad was a Great Hugger, I still remember his wonderful hugs after all these years that he's been gone. I learned that from him. He was so genuine, so real, and I felt protected even if it was a greeting hug. I learned it from him though I don't know if my hugs make a person feel the same way as his did for me. I would hope so, but one never knows. Sometimes a hug with a friend lasts a few long and wonderful moments, sometimes with others they are very short and feel somehow trivial, maybe even uncomfortable after.

    I never really thought about it much, but for some reason, am now. Thoughts?
    Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.


    True love is wanting to give to another person without any thought about
    whos getting the better of the deal.

    Love always creates, it never destroys. In this lie's man's only promise

    ~All quotes by Leo Buscaglia


  2. #2
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    Re: Hugging

    http://www.lifesupporters.com/forums...ging-6161.html

    It has been a while . And people, though creatures of habit may have changed in the past few years.

    And before you create the spinoff (Anticipating your every move )
    http://www.lifesupporters.com/forums...-etc-5505.html
    The butterfly counts not months but moments, and has time enough. - Rabindranath Tagore

    Keep true to the dreams of your youth. - Friedrich Schiller

    The only philosophy which can be responsibly practised in face of despair is the attempt to contemplate all things as they would present themselves from the standpoint of redemption. - Theodor Adorno

  3. #3
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    Re: Hugging

    In the back of my mind I thought there was a thread on it already, but when putting it into search, couldn't find it. How did you find it so easily, Vautrin?
    Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.


    True love is wanting to give to another person without any thought about
    whos getting the better of the deal.

    Love always creates, it never destroys. In this lie's man's only promise

    ~All quotes by Leo Buscaglia


  4. #4
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    Re: Hugging

    I only searched the word "Hugging"

    It was about the 15th thread that shows up then.

    To stay on topic; still not much of a hugger.
    The butterfly counts not months but moments, and has time enough. - Rabindranath Tagore

    Keep true to the dreams of your youth. - Friedrich Schiller

    The only philosophy which can be responsibly practised in face of despair is the attempt to contemplate all things as they would present themselves from the standpoint of redemption. - Theodor Adorno

  5. #5
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    Re: Hugging

    Depends on who's doing the hugging. I like to be hugged most of the time but there are some I intentionally keep my distance from. And I can tell when someone is not really into it so I don't do it. I didn't come from a huggy lovey dovey home. We loved each other and that was obvious we just didn't do a lot of touching so it took me a while to be that way but now I will hug when I feel like it most of the time.
    The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning, and does not stop until you get to the office. (Robert Frost)

  6. #6
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    Re: Hugging

    Being Dutch huggin isn't used here as a greeting, and to be honest, a 'shoulders and head' hug doesn't feel real to me at all, and to be blunt it appears to me as a sort of fake intimacy.
    But as I said, that's very much a cultural difference thing.
    Three kisses is the norm here (left-right-left cheek) with anyone that you're at least familiar with (relatives, friends and people you've known for a while) My direct family, mom, dad, sister just gets a kiss on the mouth.

    I do hug my wife and kid intensly, both in such a way that it looks like were trying to melt into one, so lets say full body contact from at least the knees upward :P My kid loves to hug, and he won't go to bed / school etc. without his kiss and hugg.

    Otherwise hugs here are more used for emotional support. For example someone is crying, has just lost a loved one or is otherwise very upset, then a thorough hug isn't out of place with family and (close) friends.

    And then theres the (close) friends hug, but that one is more side by side, grabbing eachother by the shoulder and pulling tight towards eachother, either when having good fun or as above as emotional support.

    And that's as far as hugging goes with me, though I'm prepared to adjust to a different culture would I ever visit the US/Canada for example. Wouldn't say no to a Luba hug
    NoTargeT (a.k.a. Shilka)

  7. #7
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    Re: Hugging

    Quote Originally Posted by NoTargeT View Post
    And that's as far as hugging goes with me, though I'm prepared to adjust to a different culture would I ever visit the US/Canada for example. Wouldn't say no to a Luba hug
    Careful what you wish for ...
    The butterfly counts not months but moments, and has time enough. - Rabindranath Tagore

    Keep true to the dreams of your youth. - Friedrich Schiller

    The only philosophy which can be responsibly practised in face of despair is the attempt to contemplate all things as they would present themselves from the standpoint of redemption. - Theodor Adorno

  8. #8
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    Re: Hugging

    I crave hugging. I loooove hugging.... but I'm also a bit scare of hugging - I'm sort of emotional.

    I am hugging my friends all the time - it's not really long frontal hugs, but short ones - if on front - and shaky ones -on the side, on the shoulders! I like feeling close to people, and I am blessed with quite a few friends near me.

    as you may know, I am single. anyway, I have one male friend - we're sort of seeing each other for over one month and half, but it's really just friendship. So this Saturday, I was really down and really needed a hug. I know it sounds horrid, but I just wanted my friend, with broad shoulders, strong hangs, to just let me cuddle and not say a thing!

    well, it didn't happen - maybe for the best, I was vulnerable and who knows, maybe it would have put both of us in a awkward situation.

    back to hugging... cannot have enough of them!!!

    as I have been living abroad for a while, my dad has become a lot more emotional and occasionally gives me long hugs. it makes me feel very sad, because I know that it's because he misses me. mom gives me hugs too, but to her defense, she is terrible with physically showing affection, lol! I love her to the moon and back anyways!!!
    the universe is made out of stories, not atoms

  9. #9
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    Re: Hugging

    I guess I know where my hugging came from because I hug a lot.

    I hug my daughter all the time whether she wants it or not; I simply don't care. Her mom is the polar opposite when it comes to this and I feel it's a sign of genuine affection so it's important to hug your child at least once a day.

    I even hug my daughter in public, I don't care who thinks what.

    Quote Originally Posted by Luba
    How do you feel about hugging?
    I think it's an important aspect of parenting that should be used by everyone, always! Every time my daughter is with me we start off the morning with a hug.

    I'm not sure if it helps but it does keep us from insulting each other right off the bat lol.
    Quote Originally Posted by Luba
    Do you like to hug?
    I like to hug when a hug is warranted. I don't like to hug for the sake of hugging. BTW, a hug is always warranted with your child.
    Quote Originally Posted by Luba
    Do you like to receive hugs?
    Depends on who's giving the hug I suppose.
    Quote Originally Posted by Luba
    How do you feel when a person you don't particularly like, hugs you?
    This doesn't happen to me. People that I don't get along with a usually a bit timid around me.
    Quote Originally Posted by Luba
    How do you feel when you've hugged someone and get the feeling they would rather not have you hug him/her?
    I've yet to encounter this other than when I hug friends who are annoyed with me. I like using the hug to annoy my friends as well and will sometimes chase them around with my arms wide open lol.
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  10. #10
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    Re: Hugging

    I think a good hug between friends never goes astray and i include my best male friends among this....though i only really have one very good male friend.

    Its not like i would hug them every morning but if i havent seen them for a week or two, or its a special occasion, sure, a quick hug is cool. With regards to females, a quick peck on the cheek and a nice cuddle is always welcome, well at least it is from the Ladies that i know. Ive never understood the 3 kisses of European countries and im satisfied with one (lol)

    When it all boils down, good friends know what makes each other comfy and what makes each other feel welcome......so you just do what feels natural.

  11. #11
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    Re: Hugging

    I'm more careful with the people I hug now; finding out that people I thought were friends weren't exactly. It used to be so natural, now it's not as it was, and I think that is a good thing for me to learn.
    Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.


    True love is wanting to give to another person without any thought about
    whos getting the better of the deal.

    Love always creates, it never destroys. In this lie's man's only promise

    ~All quotes by Leo Buscaglia


  12. #12
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    Re: Hugging

    Well should we ever meeet Luba, you just better have saved me the biggest hug in history or i will be most annoyed. I may even demand two

  13. #13
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    Re: Hugging

    I had lunch with a friend today. At the end, after saying good bye, we hugged and it was natural, no words needed, no awkward jokes. I think that maybe Luba's on to something, hugging is like sharing a special thing between two people. When it's natural, it happens and it's wonderful. But if one of the two is reticent... then maybe it should not happen...
    the universe is made out of stories, not atoms

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    Re: Hugging

    Quote Originally Posted by Snooks View Post
    Well should we ever meeet Luba, you just better have saved me the biggest hug in history or i will be most annoyed. I may even demand two
    You better believe it, Sugar!

    Quote Originally Posted by twinkle View Post
    I had lunch with a friend today. At the end, after saying good bye, we hugged and it was natural, no words needed, no awkward jokes. I think that maybe Luba's on to something, hugging is like sharing a special thing between two people. When it's natural, it happens and it's wonderful. But if one of the two is reticent... then maybe it should not happen...


    Twinkle, that's really what I've come to understand since I pay more attention. I now hug the people that I know care about me, and me about them; not those that I find have been kind of two-faced.
    Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.


    True love is wanting to give to another person without any thought about
    whos getting the better of the deal.

    Love always creates, it never destroys. In this lie's man's only promise

    ~All quotes by Leo Buscaglia


  15. #15
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    Re: Hugging

    I love hugs..i give them out freely!

  16. #16
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    Re: Hugging

    Quote Originally Posted by Gothmyre View Post
    I love hugs..i give them out freely!
    You've come to the right place! We have 'hug' and 'group hug' emoticons here. They are my favourites, use them a lot.
    Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.


    True love is wanting to give to another person without any thought about
    whos getting the better of the deal.

    Love always creates, it never destroys. In this lie's man's only promise

    ~All quotes by Leo Buscaglia


  17. #17
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    Re: Hugging

    I'm a "hugger"

    I hug's!

    Now a good true meaningful one is the very best! Those are secure and long lasting. There are many types of hug's. I often greet all my friend's and family with hug's when i enter and leave. Hug's i think are healthy and good for the soul. Social contact is good. I will even hug someone i don't wish to if they request it, bc i think it's not nice to deny a hug, bc they are meant in good gesture. As Duke mentioned i love to hug my daughter too. Every parent should hug their child.

    Long live hug's!!!!!!
    " To thy own self be true..."

  18. #18
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    Re: Hugging

    Nope. Nope. Nope. I am NOT a hugger.

    I have a personal zone of about 12 inches outward around me in all directions and I prefer if people stay out of that space.

    I don't really like to hug family, or friends. When I moved to the south I went into a hug overload. Those people hug you whether you want it or not. I would always stiffen up but they'd hug even tighter and tell me with that sweet southern drawl that I needed to loosen up.

    The only exceptions to this is my daughter (I hug her all the time. 100 times a day. Coming and going and just because) and if I'm grieving. If someone whom I love dearly has passed I want nothing more than for someone to hug me tightly and let me feel that connection and that protection.
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  19. #19
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    Re: Hugging

    Hugging is...weird...





  20. #20
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    Re: Hugging

    How nice that this thread has been resurrected! Whether one likes hugging or not, it's a feel-good thread, don't you think? I do...made me feel happy reading it again.



    Last edited by Luba; 10-26-2013 at 09:48 AM.
    Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.


    True love is wanting to give to another person without any thought about
    whos getting the better of the deal.

    Love always creates, it never destroys. In this lie's man's only promise

    ~All quotes by Leo Buscaglia


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