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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Oct 2004

    Drug dealer family member... should I rat?

    I am really torn on what to do in this situation. First let me tell you the situation. And I apologize in advance for the length.

    I have a cousin whom I grew up with, that sells drugs along with her live in boyfriend. It started years ago with them selling weed. He grew it and they sold what they didn't smoke. Yes, I know this is illegal but I didn't have as much of a problem with it as nobody OD's on weed and I personally think it should be legal. Most of the family knows, though they pretend they don't and turns a blind eye to it.

    Unfortunately it's grown into much more than weed. She gets prescriptions for herself but she doesn't take them, she sells it. Anti depressants, Oxycontin, and nuerotin. Those are the ones I know for sure of. It has come to my attention lately that she takes food stamps in trade for these drugs from a "friend" of hers. This woman has 5 or 6 kids and lives with her momma in a single wide trailer and she takes food from their mouths to support her drug habit.

    I too am guilty for turning a blind eye to what she does. Recently, the issues of drugs has kind of hit a raw spot in my family. My brothers fiance had MRSA and died suddenly on May 23rd. It was assumed it was related to the illness. However, they recently got the autopsy report back and found out that she died from and overdose of Oxycontin. She did not have a prescription for this. She had a prescription for some pain meds, but not that kind. It's made me think about who my cousin may sell those drugs too that may overdose on them. Or may already have.

    On top of this, her house has been being broken into almost weekly now. She's taken to carrying her prescriptions with her now so that they won't be stolen. She has three children, two of which live with her. They're 9 and 10 years old. Once whomever is breaking into her house figures out she takes them with her, they're going to show up while she's home and who knows what may happen.

    Recently, her boyfriend sent a "friend" of his to my granny's house looking for a weed-eater that was loaned to him because he told his friend that someone at my granny's house had stolen it. The person he sent to my grans is bad news. This is the straw that broke the camels back for me. By the way, what happened was that he was so high and drunk he threw the weed-eater down in the garden and didn't know what he did with it and that's why he told the guy it had been stolen. My brother had saw him do this and told the guy and walked him to the garden to retrieve it.

    My Grandmothers house is 500 yards away. My mom lives there. My daughter visits there. I no longer feel safe sending her there to spend the night.

    My conflict is this:

    It will break my granny's heart if/when she is arrested.

    The two kids will likely be given to their dad, which isn't much better of a situation.

    She's my cousin. She used to be like a sister to me. It goes against what's engrained in me to turn in a family member.

    I have found an anonymous tip website for my county that I could give a tip and then just let what happens, happens. I could even go to the local library so it can't trace back to my computer. However, I'll always know that I am the one who started the ball rolling.

    After I just read what I wrote, it seems stupid that I haven't already at least given a tip. I know this is what I should do, I guess I'm just scared to do it. I don't know what kind of backlash this could cause in my family.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    The Cloud of Unknowing

    Re: Drug dealer family member... should I rat?

    That is a tough one.

    If you don't do anything, and someone dies as a consequence (such as overdosing on Oxycontin), technically you have information that might be relevant to a murder inquest. This could have harmful consequences for you as well. And that may mean, ultimately that you may be required to testify against the members of your family in a court of law. Which would not be too great for family relationships either methinks.

    I assume that the culprits are completely unreasonable? Else you might want to consider talking to them. But obviously, if something does happen, they will hold you accountable, even if you had nothing to do with it.

    I'd say give the tip (from the library is a good idea; don't forget to clear cache and browsing history if that is not the default setting on the machine - you don't want the website to show up in the "you recently visited" website list).

    Let the authorities deal with it, but keep an eye open on people you know of / suspect are involved, especially when they have dependents in their lives. The kids hardly have anything to do with the addictions of their parents, but they do bear the consequences, and those will not go away either.
    The butterfly counts not months but moments, and has time enough. - Rabindranath Tagore

    Keep true to the dreams of your youth. - Friedrich Schiller

    The only philosophy which can be responsibly practised in face of despair is the attempt to contemplate all things as they would present themselves from the standpoint of redemption. - Theodor Adorno

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