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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Dec 2013
    Posts
    1

    My life is dying.

    My life is stuck on replay. Every day I get up trying to change just ONE THING about my life, and every night I blink back tears as I stay the same and the world moves on.
    I am a musician, yet my skills in that area refuse to get higher than that of a first year student.
    I am at the peak of youth, yet no matter how many apps I throw out, or how much I plead with employers, I remain unemployed.
    I am a student, yet with no money and n advancing skills I cannot afford to take classes for my degree.
    And last, I am a man, yet with no money and few skills, I must rely on the charity of my family.
    these things are like poison inside my soul, and they are draining my ability to love life, or even find it worth living.
    Many nights I've been near sleep and wished that I not wake, just because I don't want to see what new trails my family must endure for me to maintain where I am.
    Please, if anyone out there has been in a situation similar to mine and found the way out, Shine a light, that I might find my way to peace.


  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Location
    The Cloud of Unknowing
    Posts
    17,425

    Re: My life is dying.

    Welcome to the forums.

    Sadly, life is hardly ever what you want it to be. I am currently staying in a country where 95% of the people live absolutely miserable lives. No matter how hard they try, the system is rigged against them. They are left with no choice but to scramble to eke out a rough life. People do what they have to do, not because they want to do what they do.

    Sometimes, it is impossible to pursue your passions. Reality kicks in and dreams cannot pay bills. Sadly. One way or the other, you have to find a skill or set of skills that you can use to pay the bills. Preferably in such a manner that you can still pursue your passions, even if it is not full-time. And in a terrible economy that is anything but straightforward.

    From the introductory sentences, it seems like the various problems you experience are not isolated, but interacting with each other. Solving one problem may make another problem worse. Maybe part of the problem is that you are so used to the problems you face, that you can't see the forest from the trees?

    It might help to lay it all out, so that people can chime in to offer more constructive and to the point advice.
    The butterfly counts not months but moments, and has time enough. - Rabindranath Tagore

    Keep true to the dreams of your youth. - Friedrich Schiller

    The only philosophy which can be responsibly practised in face of despair is the attempt to contemplate all things as they would present themselves from the standpoint of redemption. - Theodor Adorno

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